A question I get often is, “Why did you name your practice North Collective?” It’s a good question and I love to talk about it. North is kind of self-explanatory given my location in Downtown Rochester. Where does the collective part come into play though? Well the Collective side of the name has been there from the beginning. I always knew it was going to be a part of the name but wasn’t sure in what manner. Thanks to a wonderful friend who helped me put it all together, North Collective Counseling sounded like a wonderful fit. Collective has been an idea in my mind since my undergrad days. What makes something a Collective experience?

When people talk about the best experiences of their lives, rarely are they talking about something they experienced by themselves. We are social creatures. We have our moments, some more than others, where we just need to be alone and that’s where we recharge and find our joy. I’m speaking to my Introverted readers – you all hold a special place in my heart. Even some introverts may agree, however, that the best moments are “the best” because they’re being shared with someone else. One of my best examples of this happens anytime I go to a concert. Do you remember those? Pre-Covid ­– when you and 20,000 of your like-minded friends would get together to see and hear your favorite bands perform. There’s something incredibly special not only about hearing your favorite songs played live, but also enjoying the music alongside others who are enjoying it just as much. Perhaps I’ll date myself here – I saw U2 back in the early 2000s and was lucky enough to be in the inner circle of the stage setup. My all-time favorite U2 song is “Where the Streets Have No Name.” The guitar riff started, if you know riff you know it’s unmistakable. The crowd screams in joy, the drums kick in and the song takes off. I remember taking a moment to take in the scene – we were all in one voice singing along and for that moment we were all on the same page and enjoying the same experience – a collective experience.

When is the last time you went to a movie at the theater? You may have noticed recently, there aren’t as many comedies at the movies these days. There’s a lot that can be attributed to, of the least is the pandemic and the fact that we live in a new age of digital streaming, so more people are watching movies from as opposed to going to the theater. How does this have any effect on movie comedies you might ask? Well there is a lot of research that goes into what makes a movie successful and when it comes to comedies, it’s plain and simple – comedies do better in a theater where people can laugh together. The movie does better and the joint experience of being in the theater makes for a more enjoyable experience for the movie goers. Laughter in this case is quite literally infectious. Have you ever seen a great movie in a theater full of people enjoying it with you? Maybe it was one of your favorite comedies the first time you saw it, or even a super-hero epic with tons of twists and turns. Shout out to all my people who saw Spiderman No Way Home before people ruined it with spoilers. Nonetheless, the reaction and environment of crowd with you most likely played a really big part in how much you enjoyed it. The experience is made better when it’s a collective experience.

So all that to say, that’s how I got to North Collective Counseling. Because, though you may not realize it, even something like counseling can be a collective experience. There have been so many times when a client has told me about, not only the change that has taken place in their life after time in therapy, but also the change that has taken place in the lives of those close to them. The client’s bravery and courage incited bravery and courage in someone else. Their new coping skills had a positive effect on their loved ones who noticed that they handle things better and that makes life better for everyone. A spouse learns to communicate and ask for what they need and this in turn opens up a new line of communication in their partner to do the same. Working on yourself has a ripple effect. You not only make yourself better for yourself, but your change incites change in those you know and love. The work done through counseling can have profound effects on your life and your relationships and the lives of your loved ones and their relationships and the ripples continue. So in whatever ways you can, do work for yourself – on yourself and create ripples. That is the collective experience.

….and now for your listening and viewing pleasure…here is Where the Streets Have No Name!